Saturday, February 27, 2010

Shahid Kapur's keen mind analyzes the budget.

Here's Shahid Kapur on yesterday's budget, in today's TOI :

"As the finance minister pointed out, we've had a fairly trouble-free 2009. But, we live in the times of terror and increase in defence capital expenditure was mandatory. I feel that besides giving our border and police forces better amenities like guns and bulletproof vests, we must give them better living conditions. These guys are real heroes and their homes and pay packets need to be bettered. It's the least we can do for them. "

Notice two key features of his message :
  1. The use of the term 'defence capital expenditure'.
  2. Complete sentences with real words.
Now contrast this with the contents of Shahid's twitter stream, for the period leading up to the budget, and the day the budget was presented. Reproduced here for your reading pleasure. Please click the image for a magnified view. It's worth it.











































Note the salient features. Only four tweets even remotely resemble proper sentences :
  1. "ishaan to my left"
  2. "hey man" 
  3. "of course i will"
  4. "hey"
Other than pointing out the precise location of Ishaan, and providing a thrilling demonstration of the overuse of punctuation marks, Shahid gives us no evidence on twitter that he is capable of such a lucid response to the budget. "Defence capital expenditure" indeed.

I suspect that Shahid is an extremely articulate, perceptive and intelligent young man who deliberately recruits half-wit morons to ghost-tweet on his behalf. But I could be wrong.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Or probably the statement in toi was a press release authored by some smart-a. May be the real shahid is on twitter. @ninadsingh

Anonymous said...

agreed.funny indeed. but hey, atleast he is not a dim-witted puppy fat-filled, star-son & momma's boy whose answer to every question is "is film ke gaane jo he wo bahut hi 'situational' hai" which I m sure must hv been read to & made to memorise by his mom. nor is he harman baweja. guess he can be proud of that.

Anand Ramachandran's Evil Twin said...

@anonymous 1 : Really? I didn't think of THAT. Wow.

@Anonymous 2 - Yeah, at least he's not a spoilt idiot. Just an idiot.

Anonymous said...

I think he also missed a 'n' and a 's' in Lonnndons.

Mr. D said...

bwuhahahahahahahahhahahha

Anonymous said...

hehehe.....

madhu srinivas said...

' better amenities like guns and bulletproof vests,' wiki - 'In real property and lodging, amenities are any tangible or intangible benefits of a property, especially those that increase its attractiveness or value or that contribute to its comfort or convenience.'

guns and bulletproof vests contribute to better comfort?? attractiveness?? either he has a great sense of humour or he's prone to using words which he doesn't know shit about.... no points for guessin which :)

Ramaa said...

Oh this is absolute brilliance :D "Other than pointing out the precise location of Ishaan, and providing a thrilling demonstration of the overuse of punctuation marks, Shahid gives us no evidence on twitter that he is capable of such a lucid response to the budget. "Defence capital expenditure" indeed."

:) Keep writing!